Let’s begin the catch up shall we?

Gosh... where do I begin?

Since my return from Peru so much has changed. I went into a lull for the first month or so but with a peace in my heart that I had not felt in a long while. It did feel a little imbalanced though. It was a sort of complacency that was also a sort of floundering on implementing anything new in my life. There was basically no spark and I was in a void. I was in hiding yet also integrating more than I was consciously aware of.

After returning from such a transformative environment, working with Shamans and all, it was like being a new person in an old but new life. My existing consulting opportunities were on the steady decline but I was more than grateful that I work from home. 

During that time I had the opportunity to introduce my sister to my new found life in LA, my beloved (whom she had never met), and we got to catch up a little since my visit to Australia back in December. She is here visiting the ashram, serving the Guru, with the desire to accelerate her healing over her six month stay. M, a person who consider my best friend, drove my sister to our humble home and used it as an opportunity to hang out with us a little. 

M and I have been in contact sporadically since my departure over the 3.5 years ago because I chose to keep away from the ashram in general. It was nice to introduce him to my girlfriend and for her to finally meet someone from that part of my life. After a few days we drove my sister back to the ashram and were invited for dinner at M's place, in one of the ashram homes.

Dinner was great! It was perfect because it was time for my love to see more of my heritage and get a better understanding of who I am. Until that point she had no interaction with that side of me other than the stories I had shared, both the good and bad times, and fairly much from my biased and sometimes inaccurate and painful point of view. No matter what I said she always felt that my Guru was awesome and could see the perfection of how all the things in the ashram and my life had played out.

It was great to see some of my old friends, M's wife, and their roommate P. They cooked the most awesome vegan meal (mostly raw) and we reminisced about the old days. We talked about some of my antics, and the ashramites confirmed many of the miracles and blessings that I had experienced while I was there. As per usual, M brought up the topic of my enlightenment experience. Not so much out of curiosity, because it fascinates him, but because he knows that when I speak of it, I relive it through my cellular memory. It is a living entity within me that I call my guarantee. Although it happened just over 6 years ago, I still listen to the tapes every couple of months with the last time being while I was on Huachuma at Heaven's Gate in Peru. Let's just say that it was a profound experience.
 

So we talked about my enlightenment, about my blogging on here, my purpose for it, and why I had not shared the details of my enlightenment story. My response to not posting it on Myspace or bogging on doing so began with the usual rhetoric and excuses of feeling inadequate and hypocritical because my life in not an exemplary example of who I think I should be. Suddenly the phone rang. M answered but no-one was on the other end. He hung up and moments later it rang again. The same thing happened... silence. His wife checked the other phone and it happened again.
 

Realizing that something else was at play we traced the serendipity of the call back to the conversation we were having about me blogging my experience. It was obvious that the phone was ringing to emphasize the importance of my owning that experience even further by posting it on here. So that is what I am going to do... but back to the catch-up...

After that realization and my promise to do so the calls stopped and my sister fell violently ill. I knew that she was processing some of the things that were going on, spoken and unspoken, for her and also for me. I had many emotions coming up but I chose not to express them. Remember, this was only the second occasion that I had been to an ashram home since I left. The prior occasion was the day prior to moving to Hollywood. The story of that is in my blogs way back in late November/early December.
 

M, during a miraculous healing that had him bed ridden for almost a week, received a message to have me watch a documentary that was being produced for my Guru. It was one that I had been involved with prior to my departure which was filmed during the India pilgrimage in 2002. Although amateur and unrefined, and not intended to be released in a major forum I was more than agreeable. M also wanted our feedback for further editing and possible inclusions.
 

So we sat down and watched it. At first I was concerned, as I remember having been interviewed for it. It was basically a compilation of interviews where people share their experiences the Guru and so forth. What struck me most were two things: 1) I probably had more onscreen time than anyone else, and 2) what I had to say was actually good, well-articulated, confident, and inspiring. I was blown away. It was a part of me that seemed foreign. It was the global producer in me that I saw. I remember my crown chakra opening while I watched and a buzzing down my arms. There was some serious downloading taking place as I watched this. Wow.
 

My love and I left and shared our experiences during the drive back to LA and we had a very powerful night. She loved every moment of visiting the ashram and meeting some of my family and was in awe of our table conversations that were far from normal or ordinary but totally uplifting and beyond words. Personally, I was happy, intrigued, and realized that my time, as predicted in Peru in one of my Huachuma ceremonies, to meet my Guru was coming soon. It was time to heal the past and come into my own.
 

Z